Last Tuesday, America's pup and I packed the stuff we couldn't live without into my car and set off on our new adventure. Thankfully, the cerenia the vet prescribed did its thing and ensured our road trip was vomit free. He was big stressed, but at least he wasn't covered in puke (for both our sake). The drive was relatively uneventful sans a run-in with a Utah state trooper that was the most terrified I've ever been driving alone.

I've made the drive from Denver to Los Angeles and vice versa 5 times over the last 18 months. 3 of those times were by myself. I never felt unsafe on those trips until I met officer creepo. I have been pulled over before. I have had to deal with cops before. But I am also a white woman and have a huge amount of privilege when it comes to these interactions. The one in question is included in that.

I'd stopped to get gas and let Rogers stretch his legs at one of the mega chains somewhere in BF-Utah. A cop passed me as I was leaving, but I didn't pay him any mind. My car wasn't overpacked, I'm a relatively good driver, and frankly my attention was mostly on Rogers for 99.99% of the drive. I pull onto the highway, start getting up to speed, and then I see lights behind me. I have no idea what I've done wrong, so I just assumed he was going after someone else and pulled off to get out of his way. But then he stops behind me and walks over to the passenger side of my car.

After the normal cop/pedestrian exchanges are said, he lets me know that he pulled me over because I rolled through a stop sign.

• I didn't.
• Pretending I did, this cop stopping to have his break/get gas/do whatever tf who had parked by the time I "rolled through this stop sign" got back in his car and pulled me over on a highway because he didn't like the way I stopped.

Annoying, but fine. I can deal with that. I just want to get back on the road, so I play the polite game and exchange pleasantries as he's looking at my license and registration and asking about my dog.

Then he asks me to come back to his truck.

I'm obviously resistant at this point because, um, no? I have been pulled over for far worse things and never once been asked to exit my vehicle. Now all the sudden this creepo wants me to get out of my car, leave my dog, and come back to his cruiser so he can question me about running a stop sign.

But that's not what this guy wanted. The second we get back to the truck — I have my butt half on the seat, with one foot firmly on the ground and my phone in hand ready to bolt if I need to — he starts asking me where I'm going. He asks what I do. He asks what color my hair is, what my eye color is, who I'm leaving behind in Colorado, what my new address is, if I live alone, if I'm seeing someone.

I have no idea how long this exchange actually took, but at this point it feels like an eternity. The moment he asks about where I live I immediately make it clear that I live with a dude. That many loved ones know where I am, where I'm going, what time I'm expected to arrive, that my dog remains unkenneled in my home... everything I can possibly think to make it clear that someone, somewhere will raise the alarm if I don't get to where I'm going when I'm supposed to get there. It isn't until I make these things clear that this fucking predator with a badge relents and says he was "just trying to get a feel for me," hands me my license and registration and lets me return to my car and leave. He refused his card.

I could think of two things as I drove away: "holy shit I haven't been that afraid for my life in a decade" and "that could have been so much worse if I was a WOC."

But we all intellectually know that part by this point. The reason I share this isn't to play the poor me card or to try and say "I get it." (I will never get it. White women will never get it.) I share the story because progressives — even the most progressive-y of progressives — sometimes get stuck in the same out of sight/out of mind mentality that others do. "Sure, I feel for the Black community and the constant harassment and abuse they deal with from the police, but it could never happen to me. And if it can never happen to me, I only have to put in a certain amount of effort into fighting the system I ultimately benefit from."

It can happen to you. I hope you cared before this story. If you didn't, I hope you do now. Read up on the Abolish the Police movement at The Marshall Project. Look up orgs focused on defunding and abolition in your area to get involved.

This Newsletter Brought To You By...

This week’s newsletter is sponsored by Dice Tower Theatre. If you dig Critical Role,Lord of the Rings or anything adjacent to it, you should absolutely check them out. It’s a heartfelt fantasy storytelling podcast based on a campaign between friends that reflects their challenges both at the table and in their lives. Dice Tower Theatre isn’t just another actual play podcast focused around a game. This is a dramatic retelling of the story events with top-notch voice acting, masterful sound design and an original score. Best of all, you don’t have to know anything about the game to enjoy this production for your ears!

How's It Going Otherwise?

By and large, I am very thankful that me and the pup made it safe, and to have Matt around prior to my arrival to get some stuff in order. A cabinet/stand almost ended our friendship, but I'm ultimately pretty thankful he's around.

That said, my movers just straight up never picked up my things and I have been going back and forth with them for a week now (when they decide to pick up the phone) so, y'know... pretty dern cranky about that! All told, though, I'm just happy to be home. The last two weeks in Colorado were pretty miserable and brought a lot of things into sharp focus. For now, I'm where I belong.

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